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But workable online alternatives for aces seeking their preferred levels of partnership and connection are few and far between.

Free apps like Tinder and Bumble, and paid services like don’t have specific mechanisms that allow users to identify themselves as ace, or to filter for asexual and/or aromantic matches.

Ok Cupid director of product Nick Saretzky acknowledges that infrastructure changes like these aren’t simple — but that they are important nonetheless.

“It [was] very complex to change a dating app that had been around for 10 years, and [we] were aware it would be a pretty significant investment in terms of time and money,” Saretzky said by email.

“It’s not that there aren’t enough asexual people in the world or in my area.

It’s that they’re not on ACEapp.” There’s also the larger issue of cultural awareness; online dating can be challenging for aces even when they can select their specific orientations, as other people’s biases and misinformation can limit their options.

I felt crushed.” Asexuality remains poorly understood by the public at large, and includes a broad spectrum of orientations; some asexual people feel no sexual attraction toward others and may be averse to sex, while others who feel no sexual attraction may still happily have sex with their partners.

Other aces (the umbrella term for those on the asexual spectrum) like Cutler identify as gray asexual or demisexual, meaning they sometimes feel sexual attraction once they develop an emotional connection with someone.

“Historically, we just haven’t accepted asexuality as a legitimate sexual orientation, and I think we’ve been only catching up to that in recent years,” says KJ Cerankowski, an Oberlin assistant professor of gender, sexuality, and feminist studies.

According to Bumble’s head of brand, Alex Williamson el-Effendi, the app is planning to launch focus groups to research a potential new feature that would allow users to select their sexual orientations.

“We want Bumble to be a safe place for people to feel like they can date and connect with people on their own terms and feel like they’re going to be in a community that is respectful and kind and supportive,” she says.

Among mainstream dating services, OKCupid stands alone in acknowledging aces.

In November 2014, it added expansive dropdown options for gender and sexuality, including asexuality and demisexuality.




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